The Brochure on Surviving My Job Search

This is where being an adult comes in. You need to pull yourself together and tell yourself that something better is coming your way. I'm a firm believer that things happen for a reason.

Hello!  Before I get into today’s topic, I’m continuing on reading reviews from Apple podcasts.  Want to hear yours?  You know what to do!  Here’s the next one.  The title is Love this Podcast!  

 “Tracy is relatable and an excellent story teller with a witty sense of humor!  She has so many interesting life experiences and brings them to life with a delivery that keeps the listener engaged and simultaneously entertained.  Give this podcast a listen – you will be happy you did!”  

It's nice sometimes to remind yourself that people like you, isn’t it?  Yeah.  I’m always grateful to hear good things that people say about me or the things I do.  Everybody need positive reinforcement.  

Today I’m going to talk about my recent failed job search.  I was listening to my friend’s podcast the other day – it’s called Moms, Moments and Martinis – give it a listen if you get a chance, and they were talking about the concept of how when you grow up and become an adult, shouldn’t you already know how to do everything?  And you don’t.  Yeah.  Really, just because you turn a certain age doesn’t mean you magically are bestowed all this knowledge, right?  Ah yes, well, it’s kind of how I feel almost every day.  Still.  It’s gotten better now that I’m older.  But I guess I still have that imposter syndrome.  I guess it’s not just an only child thing!  

So towards the end of the summer, I decided I should look for at least a part time job.  Something to keep me busy.  Something remote so I could be at home with the husband and the pets who need me.  And because we had some really extraordinary expenses, like a new central air and heat system we had to put in our house, we could sure use a few extra dollars here and there.  

This all seemed like an easy task, really.  So many things to apply for these days.  So many job sites to look through, and some that focus on nonprofit work especially.  Sure I’d like to try something slightly different from what I was doing most recently, but I’ve had 30 years of experience in fundraising, writing proposals for funding and other fundraising tasks, and that’s something I could literally do anywhere, so I was off and running.  I’ve been successful.  I have strong skills in many areas.  What could go wrong? 

A lot of different opportunities.  I applied for things that looked like I was a good fit.  Remote?  Yes.  But why were almost all of them on the East Coast?  I shuddered to think if I got them, would they want me to be available to talk to them at like 6am?  They were three hours ahead of me.  I’m not a morning person.  I tried to talk myself into it all.  But thankfully none of them said yes.  

Not only did none of them say yes, or even want to talk to me once, most of them didn’t even say no.  It was like I didn’t even exist.  As if I had never even applied.  I did finally get an interview, but they finally sent me an email that said they had gone another way.  

I started to lurk on many of the usual job sites.  LinkedIn posts jobs and it’s interesting and usually somewhat daunting that they will show you how long the job has been posted as well as how many applications that job has received.  I know from experience when I’ve been tasked with hiring at my previous positions that a lot of the applications are not even in the running.  They are sent out by the applicant without making any changes to personalize for that particular position. And some of them don’t even really qualify.  For instance, I would be looking for a development assistant, that is someone in fundraising, but would receive applications for people in real estate development.  So looking at the number of applications a job has received, and maybe it would be around 200, I would think a lot of those would fall by the wayside and not be qualified.  

Another thing I noticed was that sometimes jobs would be posted on a Saturday and by the end of the weekend, the job would be taken down or shown as expired.  This was usually on Indeed, and usually for a job I saw Saturday and applied to and so it came back up again.  That’s a quick turnaround to be taken down.  It showed me that I had to be quick sometimes.  Did it mean they got so many applications they were overwhelmed and wanted to stop receiving more?  Or they changed their minds?  Hard to say.  

Finally, two months ago, I found a part time job that seemed like a really good fit.  Not exactly the salary I was looking for, but fully remote, the same time zone and a cause I could really relate to and get behind.  Fundraising is after all selling, and you need to be able to sell the cause and be compelling about it.  I wrote my cover letter and submitted that and my resume with the references they requested, and went onto the next ad.  

This time I heard from them, and they wanted to talk to me!  I was over the moon!  I had my first conversation with them and it went really well, I thought.  Then I heard back that they wanted me to talk to someone else on the team, and I took that as a really good sign.  What could have been a half hour or 45 minute conversation turned into an hour and a half.  It went that well.  We had a lot in common and a lot to talk about, and we got along great.  Then after a short delay, I heard that they wanted me to have a conversation with a third member of the team.  Okay.  Whatever it takes.  This conversation I thought went well.  Not super fantastic, but good.  Good enough? 

Then we ran into Thanksgiving, and there was a big delay.  What was going on?  Were they not interested in me?  Were they offering the job to someone else?  Was it just the holiday?  Here’s the thing about job searches.  To me it feels like dating.  You hope, you dream, you pray.  You want the perfect match.  You want to be accepted, you want to be adored and loved for your skills, in the appropriate workplace way.  To be accepted and wanted means you are worthy.  But there’s a lot of guessing involved, just like dating.  Dating especially for women.  Is he going to call me again?  Does he want to see me?  Did I say anything wrong?  And for the job seeker or the woman dating, there are other similarities.  Are there any red flags along the way?  Is the workplace or the people working there, are they just a big mess?  How dysfunctional is it?  In the end there’s just a lot of questioning.  You have to remain positive about yourself, and you have to keep your spirits up because it’s too easy to just go in the other direction.  

And then there’s the interviews.  One time I remember back when I was in my 20s, I tried out for a game show.  I knew at the time I had to be upbeat and perky and I was.  I got into the final group, and they said they would call us all when they had an opening for the show.  At the end as I was leaving, I remember the coordinator looked at me and said something in passing, and oh, it had been a very long day, and my response was a little less than perky.  We had been there for hours acting like cheerleaders cheering on the team.  Perky and bright eyed to no end.  I was tired.  And she called me out on it.  I tried to rebound, but yeah, I never got called back.  I often think of that when I’ve been interviewing for jobs because when you aren’t successful, you start to think that maybe you said something wrong, or you let your energy lapse for a moment and that’s what they most remember.  It’s all very frustrating.  

Because I wanted to be the best that I could be, I decided to do my research and review tips on interviewing and other things to be the best I could.  I found a lot of resources including a great podcast called, “Get Hired” that originates from LinkedIn.  Not only a few episodes talking about how to ace the interview, but other topics too that I found incredibly helpful.  

In the end, I had five conversations over two months with this organization.  Sometimes I would feel like I nailed it.  Other times I knew not to get my hopes up, and certainly with all the gaps in time, I felt like for sure they were offering the position to someone else.  Then I got word from one of my references that he had been contacted.  My hope soared.  This was an excellent sign.  In my world, whenever it was time to check references, this was the last step before an offer.  Surely no organization, and certainly not a smaller one which this one is, would check references for more than one candidate?  It’s not an easy process.  Right?  Still, I was waiting.  But then I got word that they wanted to have a conversation and I felt good about this.  I knew that at least two of my references had been contacted and I knew that those conversations, at least from the perspective of my references had been positive.  But it wasn’t a job offer.  It was a conversation to ask if I would mind being a 1099 employee, and some other housekeeping stuff.  The third reference had been unreachable, so I quickly found a fourth person, and the recruiter ended up speaking to all four of my references.  At the end of the conversation, I decided to ask how many candidates they were looking at, and she told me three.  It seemed like a lot to check references to check for three people, especially for a part time position in a small organization, but I told myself that it was good they were being cautious.  

I found out during the process that the holidays slowed everything down.  During the last conversation, the recruiter told me she would be out of town for I think she said four days over the New Year’s holiday.  It was a full week later that I received the email that they had chosen someone else.  The reason being that one of the other three people had direct experience fundraising for this particular and specific cause.  I’m intentionally being general here because I don’t want to call anyone out.  

Was I surprised?  Yes and no.  Sometimes I really thought I had it.  I could visualize myself announcing to my friends and network that I had landed this position and I was going to be proud of it all.  I could barely hold my enthusiasm in for starting the work.  I was chomping at the bit.  And you know what?  I would have done a great job of it.  But the other part of me?  Well, I thought why would I get what I wanted?  Why would they pick me?  In the end, I just sat here and cried about it, and spent the better part of the rest of the day mourning the loss.  I had put a lot of myself into this search.  I had shared myself and my ideas and talents with four people in five interviews over two months.  One of the women I spoke with even told me I knocked it out of the park.  I had dared to believe this was it.  I wanted to be part of their team.  But it was not to be.  

My references and my friends and even my husband were all so supportive.  They said things like “I really thought you had it” or “you can do better” but in the end I just needed to feel miserable about it for the day.  

This is where being an adult comes in.  You need to pull yourself together, and tell yourself that something better is coming your way.  I am a firm believer that things happen for a reason.  And were there red flags?  I’ll leave that for you to decide.  But as a job applicant I think you’re always looking for possible red flags in a company.  You want to find a good place.  A happy place.  I try to look on the bright side.  Is there a bright side?  I mean, I guess so.  I got a lot of experience interviewing so when that next opportunity comes around, I’ll be ready.  And I know, in my heart, that whoever gets me on their team is going to be lucky.  I just have to find them.  

And I’m reminded again about how much like dating it all is.  It’s amazing that we ever find the right match, isn’t it?  Either in our personal lives or our work lives.  When you find it, hold onto it.  And be grateful.  Every day is such a gift.  

Now I have to go hit the job sites again.  Write some more cover letters.  Wish me luck.  It’s a new year, a fresh start, right?  

Well, that’s all I’ve got for today.  Next week we’ll tackle another topic together.  I hope you’ll join me.